Death and New Life

"I don't want you to die Mommy. And I don't want to die." Those are the words my 3 year old said to me over lunch one day this week. My brain began rapidly trying to think of what I could say to her. My Grandpa passed away this month and it is the first time our kids have experienced a death. My Grandpa loves the Lord and when we visited with 'Oma and Opa' (what our kids call them) they had so much peace about his final journey and it was very positive experience for them. They heard how much Opa wanted to be with Jesus and that it was a good thing! We had many conversations about it in the last few months. But on this day, I saw fear of eternity in her eyes and voice and my mother-heart broke. So I repeated everything we'd talked about with our kids recently, about death and what happens when we die and how we get to choose where we go. So I asked Shiloh if she wanted to ask Jesus in her heart and she seemed unsure. So we talked a little more about it. I tried to answer some of her deep questions and we came full circle to where I asked her again if she wanted to ask Jesus in her heart. She responded Yes. Talk about JOY!!! So we prayed together and she asked Jesus to live in her heart! Almost immediately I had thoughts of doubt. "What three year old understands what she's saying? She's too young to make this kind of decision. . . . ." and others that flooded in as soon as she finished praying. Then just as quickly, it is as though Someone swept them out. And He said "She will know what following Jesus is by how YOU live." Wow. That realization gave me hope and peace and an overwhelming sense of purpose. I can show her how to spend time with God every day by doing it myself. I can show her that we all make mistakes, but Jesus forgives. I can show her how to love in a world that loves to hate. And I can pray. . . . .Oh I can pray; that she will know what her decision means, what it is to walk with God, to love Him and others, and I can pray she keeps on that path. And I will. So yes, our 3 year old has asked Jesus into her heart. And no, she doesn't understand it all quite yet. But I am going to do my best to make sure that she does. And I will keep on praying! Praise Jesus!

A New Resolution

When I began this blog, my intent was to keep it up. . . . . .and anyone can see how well that went. Granted life has been a wild and crazy ride this past year. It's been full of ups and downs and all arounds :) But now that I have given up facebook due to a slight addiction that occupied far too much of my time, I still want to be able to connect and share our lives with anyone who's interested. So my resolution is to blog at once or twice a month. Here's a few pictures for you to enjoy! Adeline Loewen of Studios on Main in Steinbach took our family photos at a beautiful yard with old and vintage buildings and vehicles that made a perfect setting. In fact the family that owns the property have been faithful Red Rockers for years, so we even knew them! Our kids are growing so ridiculously fast! Chloe is turning 9 this December, Natasha will be 7 in November, Shiloh turned 3 in June, and Troy was 1 in April :) Trev and I also celebrated our 10th wedding anniversary this past March!!

6 Months Later And A New Normal

The past 6 months have passed in the blink of an eye. We have been so crazy busy! A week and a half after Troy was born we got possession of our Steinbach home.....and the beginning of an intense 3 weeks of taking an unfinished basement to move in ready. That doesn't sound so bad, except we had a newborn and we only had 3 days each week to work on the basement, while Trev finished up working at camp all the other days. Which meant there was not a single day off for Trev or any respite for me with all the kids in that first month. But we persevered, Trev and an AMAZING group of friends who volunteered their time worked so very hard, and in 17 days it was done! We did hire out a few things, like electrical, taping and mudding of the drywall, flooring and plumbing. We feel so blessed for everyone who helped us out! We couldn't have done it without you all! Despite how challenging it was for that month it was also a blessing to move in and not be in a construction zone for months afterwards. Going from this....

To this..... (it did take a while to finally unpack everything, I just haven't gotten around to taking more pics of it entirely done)

After we were moved in and somewhat settled, we began our new normal. Trev began working for his brother and that was a big new normal for us. Our camp normal meant if I needed some help, Trev could take a couple of the kids to work with him (depending on the job) or could come home and help me out for a few minutes. He was always accessible and suddenly, with a new baby and 4 kids in a new neighborhood and feeling lonely and kind of trapped at home, Trev wasn't available to help anymore. That was a tough adjustment. I had tried to prepare mentally as best I could but physically my body just couldn't handle all the kids energy all the time. And we didn't have a finished yard for the kids to play in either. Summer seemed to take forever then suddenly we were buying school supplies and finally sending our girls off to school for the very first time. In June we took a tour of the school Chloe and Natasha would be attending in fall. It seemed so odd that they would be in a public school after homeschooling up till now. The night before school, Chloe was so nervous she didn't go to sleep for hours and I was so afraid she'd make herself sick. So we prayed with her and for her HARD that night. The next morning she was ready to go without much hesitation. Natasha was pretty much just excited! She is also growing up. Just before school started she informed us that she no longer wants to be called 'Goober', but instead wants us to call her 'Tasha'. I knew this day would come, at least in my heart she can still be my sweet little 'Goober'. :)

This is them just before heading out to the bus stop and them heading onto the bus.

When they got home from school Natasha's first comments were "This is way better than homeschooling mom!" :D I was so relieved that they were enjoying school so much! They have adjusted very well to public school, but I do miss having them around all the time. Shiloh has had the most trouble adjusting to all the changes that have happened in the last little while. She did very well in the first few months but then this summer she had a rough start with Hand Foot and Mouth Disease in July, then catching the Chicken Pox in August and topping that off with another strain of Hand Foot and Mouth Disease while dealing with the chicken pox. Then when Chloe and Natasha were gone to school all day, she suddenly had no one to play with all day, and my body just kind of crashed from the exhaustion of the past 4 months that I had little to no energy to keep up with her. So that's when she lost it. It was just too much and she became whiny, threw huge tantrums regularily and became so defiant. She didn't know how to handle everything that was changing in her world anymore. It was tough go for a little while but she's slowly adjusted. We recently shuffled the girls rooms around because in her own room, Shiloh was waking up so early because she'd hear us walk past her door EARLY in the morning. So now Chloe is in her own room that was Shiloh's old room, and Natasha (who's always wanted to sleep on a top bunk) is on the top bunk with Shiloh underneath. It's working out great so far because Natasha is the heaviest and longest sleeper, so Shiloh doesn't disturb her and being in the back corner of the upstairs, it's quieter and she sleeps in a little longer. YAY! Shiloh's vocabulary exploded this summer and she went from a girl of few words to a girl who won't stop talking!!! Ha ha! She also grew enough to be able to reach the pedals on her trike and did she ever take off with it! She absolutely loves to bike!! When we'd bike to the bus stop to drop off or pick up her sisters, she'd have a fit if we were in a bit of a rush and I told her that she couldn't bike :) We are very glad that she loves to ride her bike!

She seriously entertains me all day with her shenannigans! I love it!

Troy has been growing up so fast! Even though he is on the small side for his age :) He has added so much more joy to our lives that I didn't think was possible. We are so blessed by him! I love now that he's smiling at us and laughing when we do goofy things to make him laugh! He has the cutest dimple under his left eye that shows up when he scrunches his face to either laugh or cry. We are beginning to give him solid foods now. I just truly can't believe how fast the time has gone by! In this picture of him he had spit up all over himself and all I had for him to wear was one of Shiloh's shirts!

I think our adjustment period has been going ok. We still miss camp and the couple times we've been back there, my heart still feels at home while we're there. I don't think I can put into words how much we love it there and the lifestyle and community. It wasn't without it's challenges, but it's a beautiful thing that we are forever grateful to have been a part of for so long. Once, while we were there this fall, a friend who'd spent the previous winter in the Pursuit program and is currently staying on for this winter, took a family picture of us. It was a pose I'd seen on pinterest (I have a slight addiction to that site!). Anyway, I think it turned out pretty great!

And lastly a few 'happenings' in our house lately. Natasha came home from school last week saying she was super hungry. So I asked if she'd eaten her lunch and she told me no because her teeth hurt too much. I was pretty surprised, thinking maybe cavaties, and with halloween the next day, that's not a pleasant thought. But instead it was two SUPER wiggly teeth in front. She wanted them out because she couldn't bite anything. Trev tried to grab them but her teeth were just too tiny, so out came the pliers. That little trooper didn't budge and that evening the first tooth was pulled. The next morning she'd had enough of the other wiggly tooth, so again out came the plier and there went the next tooth! What a brave little trooper! Here is her absolutely perfectly gappy smile and a matching one with her best friend Winter as well!

Next there's a few birthday's to be celebrated and some serious parties will be happening! But that will be another post once I've recovered from the parties and maybe Christmas and the New Year, lol!

Introducing. . . . .Troy Lander Wilson!

This post is LONG overdue, but I finally have a moment, between the girls and Troy, packing and being back and forth between camp and our new home in Steinbach. But I am just as excited about it anyway :) We are so pleased to present our newest (and last) little one! Troy Lander Wilson Born on April 24th at 9:46pm. He weighed 7lbs 1oz and was measured as 20.5 inches long (although the public health nurse who came and saw him a week later measured him at 19.5 inches, so someone's measuring tape is off) This day he was born was the day I had picked and hoped for because our two oldest girls had gone to Brandon on Sunday with Grama and Papa Wilson to stay until the baby was born and I wanted so much for them to have a couple of days with Grama and Papa at the farm, but we wanted the baby to arrive soon enough that we would be able to be home by Friday to be a part of the board staff retreat, where members of the Red Rock board come for meetings and we really wanted to be there for our last one. So I prayed and hoped for Tuesday the 24th in the evening. God was so good to us because that is exactly what happened :) Here is a little summary of my labour story. We had headed into Steinbach on the saturday before my due date and were staying with Trevor's sister, April and her husband Terry's place until the baby arrived. We were very thankful to have been able to stay with them :) On Sunday we took our kids to the zoo and met Grama and Papa Wilson there and after supper at Mongo's (definately a favorite restaurant) Chloe and Natasha took off to the farm with Grama and Papa and Trev, Shiloh and I headed back to Steinbach to wait for our little munchkin. The morning of his birth day was an ordinary day, except that April and I planned a lot of EXTRA walking to see if that would help kick start my labour. We went into town, ran some errands (literally, lol). Then in the afternoon, Trev and I had planned to go to our friends house for supper, so Shiloh and I walked over there. Trev met us there, then went out to run some errands. I began having braxton hicks. They'd been painful for about a month already, so I just assumed that that's all this was, except they weren't stopping and started getting even more painful. So I called Trev and when he got back we headed to the hospital. At the hospital I laboured for almost 5 hours then in one big push our little man entered the world! All through my pregnancy, I suspected that he was a boy, but fully expected to have a girl, given our track record with girls :) So when I asked and the nurse told me 'It's a boy!' I was still surprised and really excited too!! The best was some reactions of family and friends to the fact that we had a boy! Ha ha!! We were so blessed to have so many visitors come to meet our little man and share in our joy. Because he was born so late in the evening, our girls did not drive in from Brandon that night. We called them, but my mother-in-law was unable to wake them up to hear the news! So, we were so excited for them to come the next day and meet their new little brother! They had made cards for him and Grama took them shopping for him. They were so excited and loved meeting him! I loved watching them meet him :) He is one lucky guy to have THREE doting older sisters! Shortly after he was born we noticed that he was pretty jittery, more so than the typical startle reflexes, so they checked his glucose levels and found them to be very low. So immediately they put us on a nursing every two hours schedule to get his levels up to normal. The problem was, he was not interested in latching or nursing. So we resorted to syringe feeding him formula. His levels yo-yo'd for two days afterwards, all the while slowly creeping upwards, which was a good thing, but still taking a LONG time to get there. His little feet were black and blue from all the poking to check his levels. Finally, his levels were up and stable long enough that we could go home on Friday, but still feeding him every two to three hours. By this time I had pumped and was able to give him my milk instead of formula, which, once that happened his levels got better much quicker and I was so thankful for that! But still had to feed him via syringe and fingers. (Where he sucks and a little hose attached to a syringe on my finger). It was a lot of work, and I continued to attempt to get him to nurse as well. Two days of being home and feeding him this way was tiring, especially when my three girls needed me as well and his feedings took so long. On the Sunday, after arriving home, a longtime friend of ours and camps was here organizing the infirmary for spring and summer. She is a nurse at the NICU at Childrens and has been for over 22 years. So I asked her if she could help Troy and I figure out this nursing thing. And she did! And he did!! And since then he's become such a pro, that I haven't had to pump or anything for him!! Now he is three weeks old and growing like crazy! He doesn't seem so small anymore and he is doing much better with focusing his eyes and listening for his sisters. He is such a laid back guy, loud noises hardly faze him. He goes to sleep best when there is a lot of noise from his sisters, lol! We have been travelling a lot, back and forth to Steinbach readying our new house for our big move on the 26th and he has done amazingly well with all the travelling as well. So that's our story, and now for the best part. . . . .pictures!!! Please forgive the blurriness of some pictures, these are ones taken with my iPhone. I left my camera in Steinbach This is me just after arriving at the hospital

Here is our little man shortly after being born and with Daddy!

Shiloh meeting him for the first time

I don't have pics of Chloe or Natasha with him on my iPhone, so when I get those I will post them too. Here is our little man just before going home. My sister bought this outfit and I love that the onsies actually fit and aren't too wide or anything! Yay for Carter's!!

Here is one of Goober holding Troy once we had gotten home

And then just today I got a picture of him at three weeks and two days old <3

Now, I can't wait to get a full family picture done of all 6 of us!!

Maternity Pics!!

You have no idea how excited I am about this post!! I love photo shoots and when a baby belly is involved. . . . . there just are no words :) My friend Nancy is a photographer (and a REALLY great one too!) and we planned this shoot almost right away when I found out I was pregnant again.
It was a lot of fun and she took a bunch of just the girls too. So here are the pics. I hope you enjoy :) And just so you know, we don't know what we are having!
Our first born, Chloe. She is our sweet, caring, responsible, sensitive, athletic and adventurous one. And she loves her bear!


And Goober (aka Natasha) She is our little monkey, funny, mischievious, can make anyone laugh, the artist and imaginator and our tidiest one despite managing to lose her special puppy numerous times (this is puppy number 2)!


And now Shiloh, she is our silly little one, she is an outdoorsie girl to the core, goofy, a BIG Daddy's Girl, loves anything that goes VROOM!, has a huge attachment to her big sisters, is very sweet and sensitive and VERY busy! She has her "Sofie" the unicorn which she is extremely attached to. (and which we are very careful to keep an eye on so she doesn't get lost, lol)


Also, here's one of the three of them together

Now for the rest, we did some family pics, some with just the girls and I and some just the two of us. Hope you like them :)











This is one of my faves!!

Now with just three weeks to go, I think my next post will probably include our newest addition!

Precious Moments

As I was working on a project this morning, the girls called me over to take a picture of them and I saw the sweetest thing of them all cuddled up together on the couch :) These are moments I live for!

Moving Day And A Super Cool Experience!

So in a post about a month ago, I shared the really tough decision we made to move away from camp. Originally our tentative moving date was for the end of July. But now that Trev has a job (Praise the Lord!!) it works out best for us to leave sooner. Our current move date is May 26. With everything bumped up, reality is hitting a little harder that we won't be experiencing another summer here, or staff camp, or fall, or beautiful winters. . . . . . . and it is not easy. We have loved our time here, and learned and grown so much. As of now 90% of our married life memories are here and it is a little intimidating to begin a whole new kind of life somewhere else. Having said that, there is also the excitement of a new adventure, a very different way of life, being involved in a church and our girls going to public school. We will always look back so fondly of our time here but also move forwards with anticipation, a little nervous at the unknown, but still going confidently to where we believe God is leading us :)

Okay, so now, for the SUPER COOL EXPERIENCE! I was just outside with the girls before their typical rest time and Trev finds us and tells us we need to come and see something really cool. I immediately try to rack my brain as to what it could be, but came no where close!
The girls were in awe of what they saw. These pictures shows what that was :)


Yes that is a real baby bear that was born this winter! Our friend Greg (he is holding the bear) saw this poor baby running along the highway on his way back here to work and realised this baby must have no mother to be alone like that. So he picked him up (after chasing him two miles). They put the bear in our dog's kennel (much to Copper's chagrin) and fed him a little food that he devoured. So now it's just finding out what this bears fate will be. It is a cool once in a lifetime experience that could only happen in the bush! I am so glad we are still here to experience it!!
And last but not least. . . . Trev and I at the Jets game! It was so cool to have that experience! Being in the arena, hearing the crowds, smelling the scents, paying thru the nose for a package of licorice and the excitement, anticipation, disappointing plays! It was so great!! We loved it!! If it were possible we would totally go again and take our two older girls as well :) I have fond memories of going to Jets games with my dad and I would love for our girls to have that experience too! Maybe one day in the future :) For now, here's us waiting for the game to start.